I Breathe This.

A good friend of mine posted this quote on her blog awhile ago. I'd always go back to her blog to read it instead of copying and pasting it for myself. I love this friend dearly so I guess when I read it I felt like she was with me, someone who lives and feels this way too. It still captures my heart and will continue too.

"To wait open-endedly is an enormously radical attitude toward life. So is to trust that something will happen to us that is far beyond our imaginings. So, too, is giving up control over our future and letting God define our life, trusting that God moulds us according to God's love and not according to our fear. The spiritual life is a life in which we wait, actively present to the moment, trusting that new things will happen to us, new things that are far beyond our own imagination, fantasy, or prediction. That, indeed, is a very radical stance toward life in a world preoccupied with control." - Henri Nouwen

If you have never heard of or read anything by Henri Nouwen, I highly suggest you do. My life has been transformed because of his heart that he shares with us.

coffee & chai

My life in the past few years is something I can't even believe I have lived, endured. I wonder what it looks like from an outsider looking in? I always feel like the foreigner dreaming about others adventures to new lands and places. I'm always wanting more, something new, a spontaneous moment to run after full of verve, intensity, riskiness, uncertainty and laughter. A life that brings beauty through each moment when I meet it. I want challenges that face and tempt me with it's colors, smells, touch, sounds, and oh so many flavors. Somewheres and some-ones among my streets, up the hill through the winding way, below or above, or across the sea are all in sight of what I want to greet. Often I wait for it all to come to me. I say it will someday. I say soon after the loneliness passes I will find my comfort there... but I am there. In this moment I am living it. This is the life that is filling my soul with many emotions that make the heart tingle and my lips slide up to show some white, uneven teeth. The bits I've pursued and achieved will never leave my mind, nor will they ever stop being told or heard. The years have brought pain that I've dwelled in countless times. The years have revealed strengths and growth por cada dia. The years have brought me much pleasure through people whom I call friends. I continue to invite them. I invite them to realize where they are and where they want to go. I invite them to journey with me. Let our minds carry on and dream about these places and feelings, but know that this moment, this very moment is a part of that dream. We are living it.

My heart feels this way and I don't think it will ever come to a halt. I'm ready to live now and I'm ready to live later. Let's live together and share our story. You have a cup of coffee and perhaps I'll have one too, but more than likely it will be my chai tea.